Seeing The Finish Line
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All About Me
Continually, I find myself pondering the question, 'Why am I doing this?' Each time, the answer morphs, yet it orbits around a core of health, personal achievement, and demonstrating to my wife and children that all is well. My overarching mission? To spearhead mental health awareness and champion the therapeutic virtues of walking and running.
Just over a year ago, I experienced my inaugural panic attack. I recall vividly, shivering uncontrollably, imploring my daughter to fetch a blanket, my legs refusing to support me. Internally, I was besieged by the harrowing thought, 'Is my daughter about to witness her father succumb to a heart attack?' Frantically, I phoned my wife, who was away, voicing my fear of imminent fainting. Her assurances, reinforcing that it wasn't a heart attack,
home. There was a moment in our conversation, an 'I love you' exchange, which, in my mind, held the gravity of potentially being my last.
In the aftermath, walking became my refuge. There were days when I scarcely removed my sneakers, returning from a walk only to pace restlessly in my garage, besieged by a whirlwind of negative thoughts, before venturing out once more. It didn't take long for me to discern the walks as a balm, easing the accumulated mental turmoil.
Gradually, these walks evolved into a therapeutic ritual, fortifying my mind against daily stresses, secure in the knowledge that solace awaited in my daily strides. Never had I been a 'Runner.' Despite my athletic inclinations and love for various sports, running always seemed the least appealing aspect. Yet, competitive by nature, and inspired by my wife—a genuine 'Runner'—I found myself contemplating a 5km trail she frequents with a friend. One evening, I impulsively committed to running it. It was a solitary challenge: succeed or fail, only I would know. That run was grueling, my pace sluggish, my body on the brink, but the surge of achievement at the end was intoxicating, a high I could chase endlessly, without cost. Now, as I hit the 5km mark in my runs, what once was a struggle feels like a mere warm-up, the point where I find my true rhythm
gradually diffused the terror in my mind as she made her way
Need Help?
Wellness Together Canada
To connect with a mental health professional one-on-one:
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call 1-888-668-6810 or text WELLNESS to 686868 for youth
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call 1-866-585-0445 or text WELLNESS to 741741 for adults
Kids Help Phone
Call 1-800-668-6868 (toll-free) or text CONNECT to 686868.
9-8-8: Suicide Crisis Helpline
If you or someone you know is thinking about suicide, call or text 9-8-8. Help is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.